How ironic it is that the one thing I’ve dreamt about since my early teens is the one thing I fight my self against now. Through-out history, generals have lost battles, learning from them, and subsequently winning the war. This one battle I have faced – and clearly lost – has inflicted wounds that simply won’t heal, and although I realize that wounds do heal, they definitely will be a reminder engraved in my memory so long as I breathe. However, until these wounds heal I will continue to fight my self-being, desires, and even needs. This slowly-ending battle is a Jihad (struggle) unlike any I have ever faced in my life.

But just like any Jihad, it must be performed with righteous intentions & purpose in our hearts to attain a sweet reward. Allah knows of my intentions, and the purposes are many; I respect and honor her and her family’s wishes, I know that although this is a battle that requires sacrifice on my part, the reward (God Willing) shall be great whether attained in this life or the next, and finally the purpose of hope, hope to love and be loved in a manner pleasing to Allah.

Last night I had an extremely long conversation with friends on the dangers we’re facing in these times as husbands and wives, and how cunning iblees and his demonic children have become through thousands of years of experience (may Allah keep us strong). The probability of a marriage failing is unfortunately higher than it being one of true peace & harmony regardless of country, race, culture, or religion; relationships are failing due to weak foundations. However, I strongly do believe that in some cases – though few – weak foundations may be solidified with the right tools. So if you’re in a marriage and sense failure around the corner, give it your all, one, two, three times or more so long as you still have the fight in you to make it work; Jihad comes in many forms, including the struggle for love. However, it is important to acknowledge that some battles simply cannot be won, and that Love is an affair of the heart. We cannot simply ‘create’ Love within anyone, including ourselves.

If a mutual love does exist however, please, wage not only a battle, but a war, so long as your union does not enjoin upon vice. Always respect, honor, and love everyone involved in your struggle to love, pray that Allah blesses your union, and be thankful first to Allah and secondly to those who have blessed your marriage. In the unfortunate case of it not commencing as hoped, always remember that everything from Allah is good, and that you should have no regrets because you gave it your all, and that is all you could have done.

I ask Allah to guide us all to that which is good, and to keep away from us that which is evil. May you all live a life of love. Ameen.