1196529_loveThis morning before heading to work I decided to sit and read a piece on the signs of love written by a scholar of the past (Ibn Hazm rahimahullah), and so it inspired me to write a brief contribution on what I believe some signs of love may be. This may also serve as a tool to others to determine where they lie on the spectrum of Love with their partner; love can range from simply caring about a person or a stranger’s well being just as we all do for not only our brothers and sisters in Islam, but even our brothers and sisters in humanity, to a soaring love that blinds you from everything and everyone around you with the exception of your beloved, where nothing else in this world matters but their utmost happiness. These signs of love refer to the latter end of the spectrum.
Everything in this world has signs; the existence of a Deity worthy of worship, liars, good-doers, quality of an electronic item, the weather, and even LOVE. It is said that love has caused wars, ruined marriages, ended feuds between rivaling nations, driven people to suicide, been a reason of saving souls, crumbled empires, and become a man’s mission in life to achieve; truly a powerful thing this love. Do we on an individual level possess this power that can cause disaster or serenity? I did, once. These are not signs of infatuation or merely physical attraction, these are the signs of a Love based on the foundational stones of Love [Foundational Stones to Love are currently being defined in my book].

——- I will write in the context of a man loving a woman and not in a gender-independent context, however these signs may (and should) be applied to both men and women ——-

When eyes are locked with one another, it is not merely a reflection of light that your brain interprets into an image of a person being opposite you, it is both a door and a mirror. A door in the sense that her eyes represent a gateway deep into her soul that you will not allow to close for even a second, through this door you hope to unlock and grasp her desires, fears, thoughts, wants, needs, and everything else encompassed within her being because that is what matters to you; she is everything. A mirror in the sense that with every rotation, movement, and direction her eyes lead you follow; fear of breaking this connection unconsciously demands your attention to her. The experience of looking into her eyes gives you greater satisfaction and fulfillment than any physical act of love with the most beautiful woman on earth, because you live love through her.

As she bites from the sweetest fruit ever known to him, he carefully gazes at her lips and teeth gliding away while forming the bite mark into the fruit, and as her lips depart a glimpse of a glistening droplet of saliva breaks away onto the fruit is noticed. He guides her hand that holds the fruit to his lips not because he wants a taste of this sweet product of earth, but because of her contribution to this product; to a man living love it is her he wants to consume by biting the fruit.

When she speaks, he listens. It is almost as though the opening into his ear expands, and the vibrations released from her vocal chords echo deep within him, without any bone, vein, or organ escaping its rippling effect, not because it is forced upon him but because he chooses to listen to her. Though they may differ, he – without any judgement – takes her words to heart because these are her words, the one whom he loves.

Is there a limit to how deep one may fall in love? Is it possible to fall deeper and deeper for the same person forever? I cannot testify that ‘forever’ is possible, but what I can testify to is that it does not end even after a long while, and if the condition to love unconditionally is always met, who’s to say that you cannot continue to fall together forever? From the moment you wake up until the moment you fall asleep once more (and even through dreams) your life is filled with opportunities to fall in love over and over again. It is winter, the rooms are warm enough only through artificial heating, she is in the cold bathroom taking a hot shower. He is aware of his beloved, and feels for her well-being at all times; to throw a clean towel into the dryer and pull it out just in time to wrap warmth around her as she steps out is a sign of love.

People give Muslims a hard time when it comes to the oppression of our women and the strictness of our men, but their ignorance could not lead them any further from the truth. As true men, and loyal women, we care for each other on a level that is far more superior than any nation has before us due to the framework revealed to us by Allah the All Mighty. She lays in bed, clueless of his intentions, he approaches, close, real close. He desires to make love to her, but the root of his desire is as selfless as can be; it is her pleasure that he desires, second to his own. To live love, is to be unselfish to each other; there is no need to ‘take’ when both lovingly ‘give’.

She is your weakness. With a simple touch your beloved can cause your heart to stop, your breathing to cease, and your muscles to fade in strength. With a word she can break through your emotional barriers, and unlock channels of confession. When she is away you hurt, you suffer, and long for her return.

She is your strength. For her safety there is no death you would not face. For her happiness there is no job too large, nor a task too small. When she is with you, by your side, your flame of life burns with a glow bright enough to light up the skies. A sense of security that everything will be OK fills your heart by her uttering your name directly into your ear. To live love is strength.

These are but a few of many signs one may witness from love.

Note: It is important to note that there is no love greater than the love for Allah and his Prophets (peace be upon them). My writing is specifically relating to the love between a husband and wife as ‘secondary’ to that of which Allah has guided us upon. Everything said by me that is wrong is from me, and everything that is good / correct is from Allah and his messenger (peace be upon him). I ask Allah to forgive me if I have erred in any way.

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